You’ve met them in your family, your circle of friends—your co-workers. They are everywhere and they are very VOCAL. These are the people who love to give you advice. They sit back and wait for you to confide in them so that they can tell you what they think—and boy they don’t hold back, do they? Now, don’t get me wrong, in reality, advice is fine. I am a firm believer that anything based in love can only be good for people. Advice based in love is very good and needed (when solicited).

Now, the issue is when people give you advice based in their own fear!  They warn you to stay away from a thing or idea because they are afraid of it. This is the person you meet more often than the alternative. It’s the co-worker who tells you that the worst thing you can do is leave a company with a good pension plan to start your own business, it’s the aunt who says that no one can be an expert on a subject without 30 years of experience, it’s the friend who tells you that getting married after dating for 4 months is going to be a mistake, it’s the mother who tells you that you will come running home if you move to the east coast, and it’s the cousin who tells you that you shouldn’t pursue a higher education because ‘people like us’ never go far, it’s the deacon who tells you that if you question what you hear in church then you are blaspheming God. Whew! Do you know any of these people? They are like a pestilence…they are everywhere and they are clearly annoying!!!

You have to be able to recognize this when it is happening. You have to be able to pin-point when someone is advising you based in love versus their own personal fear. This sounds weird, but if you listen closely enough, you can hear the fear! You can hear them begging you to stay in their comfort zone and to not branch out. You can almost hear them saying…don’t leave me behind or don’t remind me of what I’ve been too afraid to accomplish or don’t force me to look at myself in the mirror. Readers, please don’t get wrapped up in this! Don’t get wrapped up in their fear.  If you find yourself defending your life choices to a person like this, you’ve clearly gotten too involved in their opinion. So many people can tell you how to do things they’ve never done! How ironic is that?

Ultimately, it’s your life and your decisions! You have to remember and stay focused on this notion.  Remind yourself that you can do whatever it is that makes you happy. You can move to another country, you can start that new business, you can take the new job, you can raise your child, and you can walk away from a bad relationship. Simply because of how great you are—you can do anything that you put your mind to!  Those who say they feel alive with the most memories and stories to tell are those who’ve lived their lives as they’ve pleased. They don’t wait for everyone to be on board with their decisions. There’s no time like the present for anything you want to do—that you’ve always dreamed of doing. After all, it’s John Barrymore who said that “A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.”